Struggling to bring up a dead sister’s children

Nikola Nikolov is the only working member of his family but, along with wife Blaga Petkova, was determined to keep the promise he made to his dying sister and bring up her children as his own.

The 40-year-old Bulgarian mother of six died last year in Paphos after being diagnosed with terminal cancer, which had already spread to her bones at the time of diagnosis. Only recently have the couple received any money from the state to help support the four of her children who are living with them.

“We promised to help my sister Evelina, so she moved in to our house with her children for the last year of her life. Blaga gave up work to look after her and now the kids,” the unassuming Bulgarian metal craftsman told the Sunday Mail.

The couple, along with Nikolov’s sister, moved to Paphos four years ago from Malta in search of a better life and Nikola now works at a metal workshop, making furniture and other items.

This is a second marriage for the two and with their own children grown, they are now putting all their energy into bringing up Evelina’s children.

One of the siblings, a 14-year-old boy, lives with Nikolov’s cousin in Paphos, but the couple have the eldest of Evelina’s children, her 22-year-old daughter living with them, as well as Niko, 13, Eleni, 10, and eight-year-old Dimitri.

The youngest, a four-year-old boy, lives with his Cypriot father who Evelina met in Cyprus and married after divorcing her Greek first husband.

The rest of the children can expect no help from their own father who is wanted by Greek police.

“He was given a 25-year prison sentence in Greece, but escaped and my sister divorced him because of what he did,” he said.

The mother of six fought hard to establish a life for her and the children in Cyprus, said her sister-in-law and was determined to give the children the best life she could. All too soon, the family learned the worst possible news.

“Evelina had low energy but was trying to be strong for her children and she was devastated when the doctor said she had cancer,” said Blaga.

Her husband added: “When they found it, it was too late and had spread to her bones, it was everywhere and there was nothing they could do.”

Stunned by the diagnosis, the couple stepped in and moved Evelina and her children into their modest, rented Paphos apartment. Blaga gave up her job to look after her sister-in-law and help with the children.

“In the beginning, it was very difficult for the children when she died. It’s only now that slowly things are starting to get better and we are doing our best,” she said.

The eleven long months since Evelina’s death have been emotionally and financially fraught and were made so much worse because it took that long for the state to approve social welfare payments to help feed the children, Nikola said.

That they weathered those difficult months was down to a priest, Father Stylianou, from Saint Peter’s church in Paphos.

“The welfare department didn’t care about us, they said they weren’t ready with the papers. If it hadn’t been for Father Stylianou, I don’t know what we would have done,” he said.

Every week Father Stylianou brought food for the children to eat and offered other help and support.

Though the family’s finances have improved, it is clear the family is still struggling.

“I’m not the kind of person to ask for help,” said Blaga, “and although it has started to get better it is still hard.”

The children, who are now learning to speak Greek and English, are slowly adjusting to their new situation although it is still really hard for them without their mother, Nikola said.

He added that he always tries to buy things the children need ‘slowly, slowly’, one week for one child, and the next week for another. But the thought of Christmas is daunting.

The family will hang Christmas decorations, as they did last year and give the youngsters, “the best time possible”.

“We love them and will be here for them always, they are like our own children and we try to do everything for them,” they said.

But whether they can give these polite, well-behaved youngsters what they are want for Christmas is uncertain. Eight-year-old Dimitri hankers for Lego while 10-year-old Eleni hopes for art supplies.

Niko, who likes music and is trying to teach himself the piano, dreams of electric guitar lessons.

“I have never tried to play a guitar, but I love the sound and I would love to try and play,” he told the Sunday Mail.

When asked what they would like for Christmas, the modest couple said they had each other and everything they need.’

If you would like to help the family this Christmas please contact the Cyprus Mail, mail@cyprus-mail.com